Posts Tagged ‘Jesus’

Edges

Posted: October 19, 2019 in Jesus, Life, new life, Poems
Tags: , ,

I know sanity

Far from the edge already

Enough to be enthusiastically

Feeling all levity

Living life splendidly

When I ran oblivious of HIM lightly

Steady in gravity

When in childlike wonder thought I had plenty

 

I know vanity

Near to be edgy indirectly

Enough to be imaginary

Feeling all jestingly

Living life generally

When I strutted without HIM in revelry

Heady atop gravity

When I was trendy

 

I came to know HIM in amity

From the edge of inanity

Enough to be changed in personality

Feeling all empathy

Living life pleasantly

When I tried to walk with HIM credibly

Led free somewhat through gravity

When I was meant to be

 

I know carnality

Over the edge of morality

Enough to be vulgarity

Feeling all asperity

Living life irreverently

When I walked away from HIM insularity

Offend Thee stuck in gravity

When I was in prodigality

 

I know insanity

On the edge of brevity

Enough to be deadly

Feeling all dreadfully

Living life in self-pity

When I fell apart from HIM mightily

Heavy under gravity

When I was empty

 

I know agony

On the edge of tragedy

Enough to be a calamity

Feeling all panicky

Living life drastically

When I stumbled looking for HIM pantingly

Unsteady by gravity

When I was testy

 

I know tenacity

At the edge of a remedy

Enough to be erratically

Feeling all dramatically

Living life actively

When I pressed on toward HIM attentively

Ready for gravity

When I was messy

 

I know HIM ecstatically

Brought to the edge of my humanity

Enough to be for morality

Feeling all spirituality

Living life valiantly

When I rested in HIM confidently

Defends me from my enemy below this gravity

When YOU test me

 

I know HIM as centrality

Beyond the edge of amnesty

Enough to be compassionately

Feeling all passionately

Living life in vitality 

When I walk with HIM emphatically

Makeready for far above this gravity

While I am a levy until only YOU commend me

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Forge ahead

No longer dead

Walk by faith instead

 

Ignore dread

Now stronger led

Chock full of hope imbed

 

Mentor tread

Go conquer over enemy fled

Flock to HIM in love that’s kindred

 

New life can be gained inside to prosper

Open to be saved in HIS coffer

Rock of Salvation encouraged in Truth to be HIS goffer

 

By grace you become HIS son or daughter

In compassion let HIM write your story as Author

Stock up with mercy being a living sacrifice you offer

 

Ask for greater faith to be given by our FATHER

Seek for greater hope to be given by the Spirit taught astir

Knock for greater love to be given by our Savior who fought for all refilling cups with Living Water

Why must I

Rhyme

In or out of sync

Succinct

Out the window

At a weeping willow

Reset sleep onto pillow

Fellowship wherever the wind does blow

Silhouette alone in the shadow 

Won’t make an innuendo in the end though

Crescendo

 

Why fight

Rhythm this time

How meaning will link

Brink

Of disaster thrown

Or laughter sown

Here and now known

No matter, will own

Then or later grown

Happily ever… shown

After… on into Heaven go

 

Stronger than wrong

Longer than right come and gone

Not for long, back again like a favorite song

Wrong turn, then turn back onto the narrow road walk along

Mercy new with the dawn 

Only because of YOU I belong

With faith, hope, and love I’m drawn

By YOUR Spirit conquer not with brawn

To be YOUR witness to the throng

Beyond the suicide attempt with new life prolong

 

Never will forget 

Not kept a secret

Spoken to let 

You get set

To live anew now met

With rebirth beget

Pure and true to offset

Beyond your regret

And no longer to fret 

For in HIS hands are always kept

Disband after the fight

Rest you weary soul

Only for awhile

Until the next one

Commence

 

Stand up in the Light

Test you bleary hold

Lonely award an extra mile

Still connects among

Immense

 

Hand in hand through the night

Attest anew nearly behold

Boldly forward go past denial

Instill access won

Confidence

 

Planned from the start with love ignite

Professed truth merely uphold

Closely reward into one’s heart worthwhile

Goodwill protects in the long run

In defense

 

HE understands when broken and contrite

Addressed to move inside sincerely mold

Wholly adored build up in support reconcile

Refill to coalesce faith, hope, and love into one’s cup overrun

In mercy evidenced

 

Expand with Heaven’s insight

Expressed for new growth inside clearly be told

Solely afford to overcome each trial

Skills obtain for progress where there once was none

Undeserved recompense

 

Commands to do what’s right

Manifest what’s pure and true that’s dearly unto HIM more valuable than gold

Holy accord become a reflection of the SON beguile

Fulfill HIS Great Commission for Thy will to be done

In watchful suspense

 

 

 

Childhood left far behind

Memories though remind

Of innocence 

And freedom

For a time

 

Crushes left far behind

Memories though remind

Of interest

Other than just me

And mine

 

Hometown left far behind

Memories though remind

Of stability

And familiarity

Entwined

 

New to now old places left far behind

Memories though remind

Of adjustment not ready

And coping unsteady

Disinclined

 

Youth growing pains left far behind

Memories though remind

Of failures in choices made

And mistakes in decisions strayed

Misaligned

 

Broken relationships left far behind

Memories though remind

Of awkwardness

And immaturity

Combined

 

Peace and hope soon left far behind

Memories though remind

Of JESUS changing my demeanor

And self-esteem with composure

Aligned 

 

Friends and family left far behind

Memories though remind

Of being lost and afraid

And sin’s cost betrayed

Unrefined

 

Relationship with HIM left far behind

Memories though remind

HE’s the only way, the truth, and the life

Of shock to feel forsaken

And suicidal thoughts overtaken

Inclined

 

Realities once known left far behind

Memories though remind

Of faith in HIM for HIS mercy plead for

And only HE can rescue to restore

A sound mind

 

From psych hospital left far behind

Memories though remind

Of the pain and darkness tumbling

And life moving forward in starkness stumbling 

Blind

 

Seek HIM whom I left far behind

Memories though remind

Of mental illness diagnosis

And depression with psychosis

Confined

 

New opportunities with purpose I thought were left far behind

Memories though remind

Of HIS truth and kindness shown before

And HIS Word anew choosing to seek HIM to implore

Unwind

 

Someone close I’d have to leave far behind

Memories though remind

Of HIS choice for me to marry

And HIS way, truth, and the life chosen though I’d tarry

Outlined

 

Another episode into psych hospital again I thought was left far behind

Memories though remind

Of fears revisited and hallucinations come alive

And paranoia riveted inside

Divide

 

Another miracle release yet I felt left far behind

Memories though remind

Of continuing to call on HIS name for help and fears increased to cease to be set free

And so weak, weary, and wavering I’d barely hold on to a sense of reality

Contrived

 

Somehow I’d live and work with a growing family beside trying to leave the negative far behind

Memories though remind

Of hit and miss volleys of episodes small and large in magnitude

And the loss of less and less aptitude 

Maligned 

 

There were times I’d be alright with new peace and hope replacing what I wanted left far behind

Memories though remind

Of peace and hope not lasting for long

And I was a step away from a sense of security being gone

Unbind

 

My life crashed down again heading back to another psych hospital that I couldn’t leave far behind

Memories though remind

Of the wreckage I was causing my family broken apart

And damage of decades of doubt taken its toll on my heart

Deride

 

This time I’d protect my wife and fight the enemy and my demons I thought I left far behind

Memories though remind

Of failed attempts, of fear inept, and darkness’s depths while looking above

And yet I chose to walk by faith each step of the way confronting each giant to slay -along came love

To guide

 

My sense of love for my family upon seeing them I never want to leave far behind

Memories though remind

Of desire to fight to keep and to hold them close

And choose to put HIM first and love HIM most

Abide

 

I’d falter once again to enter the psych hospital and another battle escalated with the enemy of my soul who wants me left far behind

Memories though remind

Of faith, hope, and love that remains and the Spirit within to fight the war ensued outside

And HE proves faithful to be there by my side to protect my family, then to center me to defeat my enemy of pride, of lies, of disguise, of negative ties that have followed me from behind

Tried

 

I fight the good fight with HIS grace, mercy, forgiveness, encouragement, and compassion that has not left me far behind

Memories though remind

Of the battles that still need to be fought for others to know the truth

And become HIS disciple who follows with faith, hope, and love as proof

Decide

 

HE promises to never leave nor forsake when trust HIM, so there’s no fear of what’s left far behind

Memories though remind

Of praying on the armor and saving souls as wise being a soldier who will fight on the frontline

And to press on Heavenward to win the prize as a reflection of HIS Light to shine

Realigned

 

HE didn’t leave me far behind, but left the ninety-nine to come after me to find

Memories though remind

Of the deepest, darkest pit I fell into, that I might see -what HE bought would continue to pursue with love’s stride open to what frees

And to show and tell of HIS rescue, not just for me -but for you too HE will do until we’re made new… from above provide in what HE’s

Designed

 

 

 

 

 

The fight inside was against myself

I’d lose what was good health

Witness my downfall to the edge of Sheol took away a hundredfold  

 

The fight inside my mind

I’d lose over and over

Mental illness took control

 

The fight inside my heart

I’d lose to fears I feared

Brokenness took its toll

 

The fight inside my soul

I’d lose to depression

Darkness took hold

 

The fight inside my spirit

I’d lose what’s left of freedom

Sentence in chains where demons tormented with pain and confusion untold

 

The fight inside I tapped out

I’d lose my life until HE’d step into my cage and win for me

Openness took time for new life to unfold

 

Some just see the stars

I realize who they are

Reflection’s faces of worth

Recollection’s traces from birth

Resurrection’s races above earth

 

Some just see the stars

I realize Words near are now those far

Rejections here accepted there 

Redirections steer kept aware

Redemptions appear when care to share

 

Some just see the stars

I realize the tears kept above in jars

Ramifications cause certain death yet still free to shine

Ratifications pause hurtin’/ breath yet will be wholly Thine

Representations’ applause determined shibboleth let fill eternity divine

 

Some just see the stars

I realize the majestic Mystery is in Heaven’s registrar

Revealing Abraham’s descendants with faith believing

Repealing Adam’s tenants turn in repentance with hope receiving

Re-appealing Atonements residence with love conceiving 

 

Some just see the stars

I realize HE gave all to find the lost in HIS scars

Rekindling chosen sparks to live on despite faltering in it all

Reminding open hearts to give the Light reassuring to install

Rebuilding broken parts to forgive lives answering HIS call

 

See the Morning Star

I realize HE is the Author of it all so trust and believe HIM to write the rest of your memoir

Rescuing your life from demise to become wise

Redeeming your life from the lies now arise

Recommitting your life walking forward Heavenward for the prize with no disguise